Fourteen candles were lit in a sombre ceremony for each woman murdered at l'Ecole Polytechnique 26 years ago and all women killed in gender based violence this year in Ontario.
The candlelight vigil was held in a packed auditorium at OPP Headquarters in Orillia to mark the National Day of Remembrance and Action on Violence.
But it was Dawn Novak's moving story of the murder of her beloved daughter Natalie that brought many in the crowd to tears.
"I have come out from under the shadow of a very personal tragedy," said Novak.
In 2006, 20-year old Natalie, a Ryerson student, was visciously stabbed to death in Toronto by an abusive boyfriend she had tried to flee many times.
"The signs were there but we had no knowledge," Novak, of Bracebridge, said. "People weren't reading the signs."
The heartbroken mom recounted the gut-wrenching story of her daughter's abuse and fear which was also depicted in a 14-minute video titled "If Only…Nat's Story."
Her parents only learned all the horrible details of the abuse after Natalie was killed.
Novak cited many "missed opportunities" to save her daughter, bits and pieces friends and co-workers knew and how the system failed the young woman.
One example Novak shared was when Natalie arrived at her waitressing job in the summer wearing a turtleneck and when asked about it she showed a co-worker the fingerprints on her throat.
"We need to understand what abuse looks like otherwise it can happen under our noses," Novak said.
Novak received a standing ovation as she wrapped up her talk.
"My daughter's murder is bigger than a personal tragedy," she said.
Novak and her husband Ed travel to schools on a mission to teach young people about abusive relationships and how to get help.
The couple's powerful story capped a ceremony that included the reading of names of each victim of the Montreal Massacre.
"Although the years have passed, those memories remain vivid in our minds," said OPP Deputy Commissioner Scott Tod.
There was also a slide show of names of the 36 women murdered by an intimate partner this year in Ontario.
Domestic violence is a "pandemic that continues to haunt women across the world," said Liz Wescott, Executive Director of Green Haven Shelter and Chair of Simcoe County Violence Against Women Committee.
As each woman was remembered, Novak spoke of her daughter.
"She was a lovely person. She was funny. She was smart. She was full of life and that's what needs to be remembered. Not the end. And that's hard."
And she said we must learn from our mistakes.
"Every life that's lost is a mistake. There were signs, there was some opportunity to predict and prevent it. Therefore we can never rest. Every life that's lost there is something to be learned about it."
