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EVERYTHING KING: March madness ... in more ways than one

It's about more than basketball, because March is a sneaky month; Wendy has a few ideas on how to avoid being fooled by the calendar
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March madness means different things to different people.

For basketball lovers, it refers to the NCAA tournament. I am hearing lots of chatter about betting and brackets.

For some parents and students, it meant March break and hopefully an escape to a warm destination.

For me, it just means it's March and I’m mad about it.

Yes, I know technically it is now spring as of Monday, March 20, but this year I am using the calendar as a suggestion. Fool me once, shame on you. Fool me every single year, shame on me!

March may be the nastiest in terms of weather. It’s a sneaky month. One day there is the smell of spring, and the next day, hour or minute there’s a raging blizzard.

Sun, snow, ice, rain, sleet ... take your pick!

March has a mean streak. Birds re-appear with a hopeful song, but it doesn’t last long.

You can tell cats have spring fever. There’s renewed energy and a spring in their step, as it were. They excitedly want to smell the outdoors until a frigid gust of wind slaps them in the whiskers and they head back to bed.

It's also tricky because March suggests it is time to prepare for spring. Trust me when I say it is not. Every year, I get snookered.

Do not do these things:

1. Put your heavy coat away. You’ll still need it.

2. Do not take your boots to the basement.

3. Same with gloves, scarves, hats...

4. Do not take your car in for the seasonal tire changeover. There’s likely to be a couple more storms in the offing.

5. Keep the shovel and ice scraper within reach. See above.

6. Careful with car washes or risk your windows freezing up. This is so embarrassing at the drive-thru.

7. Do not go crazy at the nursery on seeds or plants. That has to wait until May.

8. Spring cleaning? Avoid at all costs.

A big mistake I always make is to rush into the holidays. Once the Christmas decorations are put away, I hurry to move on to spring in the house and outdoors.

Now, here I sit with Easter eggs in every bowl and bunnies on every shelf. While that’s fine in the privacy of my own home, the rush to spring and being outside makes me look like an idiot. My urn inserts are still frozen into the pot, so there sits evergreen and pine cones juxtaposed with a pot of coloured plastic Easter eggs and daffodils.

Clearly, I am the talk of the neighbourhood as being bi-seasonal. Ridiculous!

I guess what I’m suggesting is this is the one time of the year when you can take your time and even procrastinate a little.

While you may think you’ll be ahead of the game, in most cases you will just end up doing the cleanup twice.

So I say continue to hibernate a while longer.

During March madness, I have no intention of betting on basketball nor am I going to wager that the rotten weather is behind us.

Having said that, I wish you a happy spring, but I’m going to put that in brackets.


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About the Author: Wendy King

Wendy King writes about all kinds of things from nutrition to the job search from cats to clowns — anything and everything — from the ridiculous to the sublime. Watch for Wendy's column weekly.
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