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Everything King: Breaking up with your service provider

Grow a backbone first

(This blog in no way suggests how I personally feel about my hairdresser, manicurist, doctor, dentist or veterinarian and is simply for entertainment purposes OR it may be slightly passive aggressive)

We’ve all been there a time or two.

You find it necessary to discontinue the services of a hairdresser, manicurist or any other service provider.

The question is: how do you do it???

If I knew the answer, I wouldn’t have had the same hairstyle for 15 years.

After you have been to any office on a recurring basis, you now have a relationship.

I have a feeling it’s more of a woman thing, but we have friendships rather than just business deals. We talk. We share.

While it is true we are really the customer paying for a service, I can’t seem to break it off.

Once they know about your life, your work, your weekend plans and when your cat’s birthday is, how do you extricate yourself?

It would be easy if the service provider was bad at the job or nasty. But what if you just don’t especially like them?

I know what you are going to suggest – be honest. Tell the truth! Honesty is the best policy.

“No, no. Anything but that!”

It is too much like a break up.

What do you even say?

“It is not you it is me.”

“I’m just not that into you.”

“I just don’t feel a real connection with you.”

“It's complicated.”

“Apologies, my dear, but your soul sucking, energy-draining conversations make me want to pull my hair out strand by strand.”

Do you think it might be better to fudge the truth?

“I can’t come back because your office magazines are too old.”

“I have to take a break from nail polish as I have a weird fungus that is likely contagious.”

“I’ve decided I don’t really need all my teeth. Thanks anyway.”

"You called my cat fat and hurt his feelings."

I have been told to just stop going back. That sounds so mean. Isn’t that like “ghosting” someone? I actually did that once when I switched doctors. I couldn’t bring myself to tell the truth which was that I didn’t think he could save me if I keeled over in his waiting room. I just never went back. Yes, I am a coward. It doesn’t sound fair to not explain to the person why you are moving on. I would think a professional would want to know if they were doing something a customer doesn’t appreciate so they could change it.

Others will say it is “just business." I guess it should be but anytime someone has crushed my spirit by saying those words “this is just business not personal," it felt very, very personal.

I swear, the thought of hurting someone’s feelings makes the thought of moving or entering witness protection sound more palatable.

Until I grow a backbone, I will suffer in silence plastering on my fake smile. And when they say those dreaded words “do you want to book your next appointment?” I shall say, “You bet I do. Can’t wait!” as I slink away in self-hatred.

Maybe what I need is a therapy appointment—gosh, I hope I don’t have to admit how I feel.