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Everything King: The naked truth

Sometimes 'the girls' just want to run free
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Everything King (with Wendy King)

This comes under the heading of “rude awakenings.”

Home is where you can go to look as bad as you want and nobody can criticize you. At least, that should be the case. It is the comfort zone. I am curious: “Do you stay dressed up all the time? Morning until night? Overnight?”

When going out, in public, I try to dress up with nice clothes, jewellery and full makeup. I believe in sprucing up, BUT once I am at home, the bra comes off and the crappy clothes go on. Usually it goes right from office wear straight to pajamas despite the time of day. There’s not much in between.

I got to thinking about this because twice in the last month, I was surprised by a maintenance man when I was not properly dressed. Actually, I wasn’t dressed at all when a gentleman showed up on my roof looking in my window. I jumped out of bed, grabbed some clothes, tripped over the cat and ran out of the room without ever making contact. I may or may not have closed the blinds on the way out—it was a blur for me and if there is a God, it was a blur for him as well.

I did not leave the house the rest of the day just I case he was still in the neighbourhood.

I never saw the guy again anywhere in the area. The entire construction crew had cleared out. I suspected he was on stress leave. I didn’t ask.

I put it all out of my head until this week when it happened again. Seriously. How dirty are my windows????

My cat alerted me, or tried to, by staring at the window and making noises but I thought it was a bird  Nope. The workman is back on the roof. I’m in bed – still naked – and we go through the dance again. I jump out of bed, grab clothes and run to another room.

Come on! Can they not leave a note that they’ll be on your roof on a certain day? What’s with all the surprise rooftop visits? Santa is the only one allowed there and only once per year!

Do I have to be fully dressed at all times in my own home? I am not an exhibitionist and I almost always have my drapes drawn even in the daytime. But should I have to? People have different lifestyles and different shifts – people sleep at different times – how can you judge when to be put together or when to be in the altogether?

Here is the naked truth. If you are a woman, you just don’t want to always have the bra on. Sometimes “the girls” just want to run free. It is our right. It is our dream. I assume men feel the same about their Fruit of the Looms.

I must be honest. I was slightly excited to see the guy return  Hey, maybe his view wasn’t so bad. That is what I am going to choose to believe.

If he returns a third time, I am going to just go ahead and invite him in.


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About the Author: Wendy King

Wendy King writes about all kinds of things from nutrition to the job search from cats to clowns — anything and everything — from the ridiculous to the sublime. Watch for Wendy's column weekly.
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